I look around the grave for an escape route of old routine there doesn’t seem to be any other way. ‘Cause I’ve started falling apart, I’m not savouring life. I’ve forgotten how good it could be to feel alive…

Brother: You’re dizzzzzzy bruv!

Me: Errrr, do you even know what that means?

Brother: It’s like crazy or weird.

Me: *rolls eyes* I’m not crazy or weird. What you on?

Brother: YES you are! And now you’re annoyed. And you haven’t said a single nice thing to me this morning. You’re always depressed. And you never laugh except when you’re playing tik tik1 or when you’re on your laptop talking to your girlfriend.

Me: Shut up you idiot! I don’t have a girlfriend. T_T

2nd Jan 2011

*****

Occasions like the beginning of a new year or a birthday allow us to take out the measuring stick and see how much we have grown, see how much we changed over the last year, and determine where we are standing. It gives us an opportunity to blow the dust off the goals and resolutions we set ourselves at the beginning of the previous year and take a break from the daily grind of life and see where the world has taken us. Are we still standing at the cross-roads lost, with no direction, no purpose, or have we found a path, our path, leading us where we want to go?

Here are my resolutions for this new year (in no particular order), and you can ask me at the end of this year if I was able to fulfil any of them:

  • Stop being so nice and yet overall be more nice to people (refer to conversation with little brother above). Don’t ask me to explain this one.
  • Survive next semester and make time for people even when there is little time. I’ll show you my weekly timetable once uni is in full swing.
  • Stop procrastinating Procrastinate less. I don’t think a 10,000 word dissertation can be written the night before. Maybe it can. I haven’t tried so don’t know. Hmm… Cutting down on the time wasting would help too.
  • Smile more and actually be happy for at least 10 minutes a day. Maybe it’s time to start smiling lessons in front of the mirror.
  • Improve my vocabulary, and add more long and weird jargon words to my lexicon. The longest word I know at the moment is probably ‘hypothalamic-pituitary-gonadal axis’. SHUSH! it is a word and not 3 words with dashes in between.
  • Write in my diary more. Yes I have a diary. Not a ‘Dear diary’ type diary, but a diary.
  • Try not to forget any birthdays or anniversaries this year. I’ve started writing them in my year planner though I have forgotten a lot of the dates. Eeeek! Send me your dates people.
  • Try and give library books back at the right time. Once I got a fine of £32.50. I could have bought 6 copies of that same book and still had money left over for some chicken and chips.
  • Create a TV booking sheet, as to allow me to book my rightful place in front of the TV when Manchester United matches are on.
  • Get a new job and somehow fit it around my already cramped weekly schedule.
  • Rediscover the Nas I remember as a distant memory. Time to finally come out the closet I think. Eye rolling smile NO Not THAT closet. I’ve never been in THAT closed. Will elaborate on this one later. Just remind me.
  • Reference all my blog posts properly so that Furree Katt knows where my titles come from.
  • Eat more badaam (almonds). UPDATED – 20 minutes after having initially posted.
  • Learn to realise when food is hot and safe to eat. Just burnt my tongue AGAIN eating my fav daahl. UPDATED 2/01/11 @ 20.58.
  • Remember to update this list, and actually stick to it.

We should not just celebrate the end of a year and the beginning of a new one, we should celebrate the end of every day knowing we made someone happy and start the next one hoping we can do it again...2

Last time I was at the bank waiting in the queue to pay a bill, I heard the following from an amazing little girl, who was no more than 9 or 10, talking to her friend and it brought a smile to my face:

This is my last cookie, and I’m only giving it to you because you’re my best friend. I hope you like it.

Would YOU share your last cookie?

Smile! And make those around you smile. :)

_________________________________

Title: Machines – Biffy Clyro
1 Tik Tik, noun. A game played by my brother and I in our bedroom upstairs with a shuttlecock and hardback books. Rules are similar to badminton. It was named as such by the mother. Injuries experienced are predominantly to do with the fingers.
2 Quote from http://www.boardofwisdom.com/ which I read on another blog.

27 Response to "I look around the grave for an escape route of old routine there doesn’t seem to be any other way. ‘Cause I’ve started falling apart, I’m not savouring life. I’ve forgotten how good it could be to feel alive…"

  1. Anonymous Says:

    lol the comments with your brother are funny!
    maybe you should rephrase the first one to include "be nicer to people who love & care for you."
    you know maybe you write a list of library books & when they're due back & stick it on your notice board. This always works for me and I've never had a fine.
    awwh girls with cookies, dont you just love them?

    hope you stick to this long list

    ~miss anon~

  2. Amira Says:

    lol funny post. Your brother sounds like mine. According to my brothers I don't smile before 11 pm and am a weirdo who never laughs. Anyways nice post hope you can accomplish your goals inshallah.

  3. Yours Truly Says:

    Your brother is hilarious :P and we'll elaborate more on That convo later. The resolution looks goood, I hope you can stick to it and get all those things done. Here's a suggestion...if you find you're having trouble handling all those bullets then you should erase one or two, like the one about creating a Tv booking sheet for when the games are on, That one isn't important ;P. And some of them..like the the 11th one, you can count on some to help you with that!

    Awesome post. Thanks for sharing =] x

  4. Furree Katt Says:

    i am Furree Katt, not Furee Katt =P
    'NO not THAT closet' <- haha.
    tik tik sounds like fun. :P

  5. Nas Says:

    @ Miss Anon: I think niceness is not just for people who love and care for me, for I already try to be nice to them. The hard thing is, being nice to those that aren't.
    Good idea! I've stuck a post-it on my laptop desktop thingy.
    Haha! Is was soooo cute! The little was just about to eat her last cookie and saw her friend looking at her googley-eyed.
    Thank you! Insha'Allah.

  6. Nas Says:

    @ Amira: Haha! Maybe it's something brothers share? Jazakallah :).

  7. Nas Says:

    @ Yours Truly: How did I know you were gonna pick up on that one? I stuck it hidden away in the middle hoping it'd not attract too much attention.
    Thank you :).
    x

  8. Nas Says:

    @ FuRRee Katt: SoRRy :P. I'll change it in a bit. I need to update the list as well. LOL! I need to calrify myself better, in regards to that closet comment.
    It's amazing! Really good work out, esp as the room isn't that big, and with beds and tables and whatnot, really makes it interesting.
    And shouldn't you be in bed woman?!

  9. Kamila Says:

    I'm curious about that closet thing.. hahahah...

    That's good you made your resolution this year.. I mean many people now a days are being negative and won't make resolutions..so that's a great list..

    hope you can update it and stick to it,.. goodlucK!!

  10. Anonymous Says:

    Surely point #11 scores me some points mister?
    Perhaps a combination of #s 6 and 8 is needed?

    I think you already achieve most of these, certainly the first few. But the Badaam are definitely needed and should help with the rest that involve memory =P

    I also agree with Yours Truly! No need for the timetable...

    xXx

  11. Anonymous Says:

    Haha bro, you didn't write: Make "me" time. Have some fun man. After reading the 5th last bullet and the You're life sounds as if you have gray hairs :P

    and please PLEASE get rid of the word verification. It's in the comments section of the settings!

  12. mustikasari Says:

    This comment has been removed by the author.
  13. Nas Says:

    @ Kamila: Thank you! :)

  14. Nas Says:

    @ Anonymous: Oh shush you! It's not THAT closet which you refer to :P
    Awwwh. But timetables are important and allow one not to waste time o_O
    x

  15. Nas Says:

    @ рεяfεcтℓγ▪ιмpзяfзcт: Make me time, or make you time? *confused*. Thanks! lol. I have one grey hair and a few golden ones o_O.
    Awh okays. I will do.
    :)

  16. Nas Says:

    @ Mustika Sari Sayuti: Thank you! A very very happy new year to you too :).
    And btw, just for records sake, I'm not a sis.
    Wasalaam
    :)

  17. Anonymous Says:

    Haha. I sound like your brother.. Hehe. When I was young (way younger), I'd always go around, teasing my brothers and making them angry. I know they won't lay on me, 'coz I'm the youngest and the only girl in the family. Hehe..

    Anyway, your resolution list looks pretty.. reachable. THough, be sure to actually stick to it the whole year is the hard part, huh. I have mine posted in my blog, just a few hours ago.

    Hmm.. I also forget birthdays of friends and relatives. Always. But good thing, there's Facebook. LOL..

    So, good luck with your New Year resolutions. Happy New Year!!

    P.S.
    That's a very sweet gesture, and it sure did bring a smile to my face, too. Would I share my last cookie? Hmm... Let me think. I'm not sure.. What kind of cookie is it? Chocolate chip? Hehehe... Aah. Little girls with cookies. They're soooo cute!

  18. Anonymous Says:

    Ooppss... a typo.. "lay a hand on me, 'coz..."

  19. Anonymous Says:

    Does it matter that you didn't mean it that way? You still stated it! 5 points to me!
    But the football is already on a timetable - the TV's... you don't need to make another yourself, as it will be on exactly the same channel at the same time as the TV says... unnecessary....

    I also agree with рεяfεcтℓγ▪ιмpзяfзcт, you need "you time". You're a busy person and need to just chill out and take time for yourself occasionally!

    xXx

  20. Nas Says:

    @ Leah: My little brother can be the cleverest, wittiest, and most annoying-est little boy ever at times. 8-)
    Thanks! I will try to stick to them, and I saw your blog and posted on it. Except I think I ummm didn't realise there was writing after the pictures for some really stupid reason. -_____-
    Thank you for the follow, and thank your reading.
    :)

  21. Nas Says:

    @ Anonymous: You can't just award yourself points like that! And if I gave you 5, then you'd take the lead. :P.
    x

  22. Anonymous Says:

    I think you've been in the lead long enough =P You've tried to award yourself points several times, and I've usually accepted. And you know what? It's on my account anyway, so I can do as I please, mwahaha.

    xXx

  23. [[[ x Smiley x ]]] Says:

    LOL! your bro summed it up pretty well. You have this entire year to prove him wrong, break a leg with that :P
    #1 definitely needs a good work on, you know what I'm saying mann.
    £32.50, no ways?!That's shameful. I had to pay a tenner once, and I thought that was alot. 8-)

    Good luck with all your new years resolutions! They are pretty realistic, unlike ahem.
    stay smiling :)
    x

  24. Anonymous Says:

    lol make "ME" time as in time for yourself :P

  25. Anonymous Says:

    oh p.s thanks for getting rid of the word verification !

  26. Hina Says:

    If you start smiling lessons infront of the mirror then maybe your brother is right about you being "dizzzzzzy" lol

  27. mustikasari Says:

    oh I am sorry Nas! my fault! but still, happy new year! :D

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