It’s Friday morning afternoon, I have work to do but really can’t be bothered. I’m sitting here with The General talking about all sorts of random stuff. What? You wanna hear? Okay…here’s a collection of some of the things that have happened over the last week or so.
Friday 18th
A week after my actual birthday we all decided to have a birthday lunch for me and another loveeeeeeely person. A joint birthday you could say. So I ordered my chicken and ate. It tasted alright at the time but by the evening however I was starting to feel a little off. Saturday morning, I woke and had to run to the toilet, an act I would be repeating all day. All of Saturday I had that weird feeling the pit of my stomach which comes just before you want to puke. After having dinner, I drank some water and that tipped the balance. Luckily I made it to the toilet in time to empty the contents of my stomach (through both ways). I was vomiting all of Saturday night, and bits of Sunday as well. 
*****
Sunday 20th
We were sitting down eating dinner, my siblings and I. My brother started singing:
Brother: *singing* In my head, I see you…1
Sister: *singing* I hear you in my ears and you can’t sing…so shutup. And I know I can’t either, so I’ll shut up too.
My brother ended the whole incident by throwing a mattar (pea) at her.
*****
Monday 21st
I was telling the General about just how bad I had been feeling over the weekend, and he replied by saying:
The General: Guys were doing you both ways and you just couldn’t handle it.
Then later, while talking of his own bad stomach near the end of the day, the following was said:
The General: I feel your pain down there..
Me: Ewww…dude I didn’t cause you any pain down there.
*****
Wednesday 23rd
It was just after stem cell lectures, The General, Dummer (AKA Black Dick) and I were sitting in a base room doing very little.
Me: I know someone with 11 siblings.
Dummer: I know someone that had 89 kids.
Me: OMG! 89? No way?
General: No way!
Dummer: 8 or 9.
Me: I thought you said 89 for a second, was gonna say. Now it makes more sense.
General: I know someone with 15.
Dummer: They must’ve been at it for a good 15 years, one after the other.
General: Yeah they were Bengali.
Dummer: The Bengali women just lay there and a fish comes along.
Me: Haha! What the hell? I know Bengalis and fish are quite intimate, but having babies with fish. *rolls eyes*
Dummer: Imagine if Bengalis made hentai, the fish would be the lead characters.
We don’t just talk all rubbish, we discuss a bit of science as well. The conversation continued and ended up on AIDs:
Dummer: Man had sex with a monkey, that’s how AIDs came about.
General: It actually bit him. And it’s possible the rhesus strain of SIV is very similar to HIV.
Dummer: Sounds much cooler to say he had sex with it, and HIV can’t transfer orally.
General: It can, through the…
Dummer: Yeah but it’s really rare. That guy told us in yesterday’s lecture…Robin Shattock, I think he knows a lot more about HIV than any of us.
Me: AIDs is spread much more rapidly through mucosal surfaces such as the vagina, where dendritic cells pick up the virus and transfer them to lymph nodes.
Dummer: Say you were speaking to someone, how would you know they had HIV?
Me: At the end of this degree you can walk around with a HIV testing kit, if there is such a thing. And if someone wants to mug you, just be like ‘I have AIDs and am not afraid to use it’.
Dummer: And you squirt it in their mouth… If you get what I’m saying.
Me: Ah man that’s disgusting!
*****
Thursday 24th
I happened to lose my house and locker keys on Wednesday and so was worried all day on Thursday. While walking past my locker at the end of the day, I saw my keys dangling there, still inside the lock. You’re allowed to say what an idiot. But only if you can do it with a Jamaican accent.
Rosaline: (text) Guests are here. Just roasted myself in the kitchen 
Me: (text) Did you marinate first? Though to be honest, I’d prefer you raw. x
That sounds a lot worse than it’s meant to / was intended to. Am I allowed to explain what I actually meant when I said that? No? Hmph. Okay.
*****
Friday 25th
The General talks about wives a lot and about how he would steal my wife, just before we were to get married. Maybe it’s to do with the fact I really annoy him about being gay and liking BMWs. If you don’t know what a BMW is, let me just tell you I’m not referring to cars. I was thinking about adding a picture of one for a second, but it’s not appropriate. How can I not think he’s gay when he says stuff like:
General: How do I find that happy and stress free person I used to be?
Me: I guess he’s still there, just sleeping. You just gotta wait for him to wake up.
General: Yeah sleeping with other guys!
And when he started on my future wife and marriage popped up he said:
General: I’ll bring you along when I buy my wedding saris…
Can I tell them what you do at weddings?
*****
Hope you all have a lovely, relaxing and fun weekend. What are your plans? I’m off to Paris 
_________________________________
Title: A song we used to sing in primary school assemblies.
1In my head – Jason Derulo.
Picture 1 – Showing Tuileres Garden, Paris taken from here.
Posts
25 February 2011 at 15:01
Hahahahahahaha.
OMG. I had to double check the blog link to make sure it was the ever-serious Nas who wrote it. LOVED this post. Oh and that brother of yours has kinda grown on me. :P
If that's what random is to you, I hope to God you go random for the rest of your life.
25 February 2011 at 19:54
NAS, i didn't expect this kind of post from you ever! :DDD this was super funny. you have to post a picture of your brother someday. :D
Dummer sounds totally awesome!
R U RLY GOING 2 P@RIS? O.O
25 February 2011 at 20:00
Smiles at the dinner conversation!
GAGS at everything else.
Have fun in Paris x
25 February 2011 at 20:06
@ AcetylCholine: lol glad you liked it :P.
25 February 2011 at 20:07
@ Furree Katt: Haha! Good to have made you laugh :). Well atm, we're either going Paris or Brugge (in Belgium) not decided yet.
25 February 2011 at 20:08
@ Yours Truly: Trust me, it gets a LOT worse. This was really quite filtered down.
Thanks!
:)
x
25 February 2011 at 21:13
LOL! Awesome post!
I know Ive said this before and Im gonna say it again, simply because he deserves a repeat. Your little bro is a classic!
&& Im not one bit surprised at Wednesdays conversation. 8-)
Have a wicked weekend! :) x
25 February 2011 at 22:11
I need to start coming in on Wednesdays, I'm missing out! LOL
And you should have said about Nandos before we went! Grr to you :P xxx
25 February 2011 at 23:16
Is it inappropriate to say I laughed so hard? Oh wells. OH && have F-U-N in Pariiiis! :D
27 February 2011 at 10:59
@ Smiley: Haha, you'll hear more of what the brother did soon :P. And thanks :).
Hope you're having a good one too!
x
27 February 2011 at 11:06
@ Sunshine Bubble: Don't you have lectures Wednesday morning? Or are you sleeping at that time? 8-).
Well both you and birthday girl LOVEEEE the place, so I thought I'd go to make up for having had to cancel the restaurant day.
But yeah, never going again.
x
27 February 2011 at 11:14
hijabi hippie hypo: No, not at all. If it were to be inappropriate, then I think you'd not be the only one. And thank you! :)
28 February 2011 at 02:05
One of our national heroes (Gral. J. J. de Urquiza) is said to have had 105 children! :O
28 February 2011 at 09:11
NAS! I'm BENGALIIIII! :| Im not lying around for some fish to come (no pun intended) and impregnate me with 15 children. fool! hahahahhaha...
28 February 2011 at 09:12
Oh and Hapy Belated birthday! :) Sorry I didn't know! Hope you had fun :) :)
xx
Pooja
28 February 2011 at 11:24
@ Pooja: Haha! The General is Bengali, and most of the fish coversations we have are just to annoy him :P.
And thank you very much :).
x
28 February 2011 at 11:25
@ Ella Unread: WOW! :O. We discussed obscene numbers as well, but theyt can't be from the same woman 8-).
1 March 2011 at 04:57
Okay @ loosing keys: What a heeediot likkle bwoiii (I dare anyone to top my jamaican accent) :P :P :D
I am literally laughing as I type. I died about the Hentai part. I thought I was one of the only people who knew what that was I learnt it when I was like 12/13 yrs old... Damn the Asians (oriental) in my school. But my dirty mind could not comprehend BMW. I'm too afraid to search it up. But I will *searches* couldn't find anything. Your friend Dummer is EXACTLY as dirty minded as I am. I enjoyed his jokes a lot. I would like to hear more ^_^.... as for the text message haha! I mean maybe you're a little freaky unconciously? See I would have said that and meant it :P Girl or guy I don't judge :P
Aurevior mon ami :)
1 March 2011 at 04:58
I WANTED TO MENTION OMG YOU HAVE NANDO'S? SO DO WE :D
23 June 2011 at 18:53
CHORUS
Wake up each day,
Sun shining through,
Showing the way to,
A better world for you,
Wake up each day,
Sun shining through,
Showing the way to,
A better world for you.
VERSE 1
Morning is the time,
Make each day seem fine.
In all you do, just try a smile -
Makes each task seem so worthwhile.
Friendships every day
Help you on your way.
They give you strength when you are down,
Bring you smiles to ease your frown.....
CHORUS
Wake up each day,
Sun shining through,
Showing the way to,
A better world for you,
Wake up each day,
Sun shining through,
Showing the way to,
A better world for you.
VERSE 2
Every girl and boy,
Fill each day with joy,
Helpful hands and gentle ways
In our work and in our play.
Then when day is through,
Look back on all you do.
Have you given of your best?
Happy hearts will win the test..........
FINAL CHORUS
Wake up each day,
Sun shining through,
Showing the way to,
A better world for you,
Wake up each day,
Sun shining through,
Showing the way to,
A better world for you.....and me!
22 August 2011 at 02:33
OMG. This has to be my most fave post in your blog. The best one ever :D Dummer sounds like me before I lost my raw masculinity this Ramadan (still trying to figure out if its a good thing or a bad thing, though I'm leaning towards bad cos it makes me a bit gay) ... LOL fish hentai ahahahaha :D your right, The General (like moi) sounds super awesome too :D
TOP POST MAN! Mind blasting :D
25 August 2011 at 11:55
Haha :P. It was mainly just randomness, I guess that's why you likes it sooo much.
:)
25 August 2011 at 19:21
True dat 8-)